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Monday, October 31, 2011

Happy Halloween!

Random Halloween snowstorm put the kabosh on parties, but I was determined! 

Turns out Stately Grand Street manor is the best dance party in town!

Friday, October 28, 2011

Last Nite's Party: Lotus Eater Machine

At "Pussy Faggot" last nite, Mr Taurus tore the tiny stage a new one while performing with Lotus Eater Machine

I have to say the big bag of shredded paper confetti the lead singer threw out into the audience was a nice touch

People played with that ish all nite. Oh gays, we're so easily distracted.

Speaking of which I tried my hardest not to fixate on this battleship skull cap in front of me


Well if you're a little weenie like me and still haven't secured a costume for the big weekend perhaps you can pick up a timely Richard Nixon, Power Rangers or She-Ra costume at today's costume swap.

This is a great chance to go green, upcycle old ish and there's spooky music and face painting and you'll finally found a proper resting place for that Monica Lewinsky costume haunting the back of your closet.

Info here:

Thursday, October 27, 2011

The Power of Jessica Lange-uage

American Horror Story really tries every week but only Jessica Lange's Miss Havisham-eque neighbor (and possible ghost?) Constance regularly gives it with ease

So I'm gonna compile a lexicon of Constance's Comments.

This week's Jessica Lange quote

"One minute he's reading the next minute his hand's down your pants"

Sounds like my kinda man.

Sounds Dirty But Is Not...

Tonite the voice saying these words will not some a*****e shouting hate from a car driving by me late at nite, but rather my own at the door of The Delancey

Mr Taurus is dancing tonite with Lotus Eater Machine and if you RSVP now, discount! 

This Week's Top Model Moment

Bianca got the ax. True she was kinda a mega-bitch but man could she quip!

This week she refused to splash about in a tub like an idot at a party promoting signature fragrances that will never see the light of day. Her refusal was all too obvious: "Tyra would never do this!" 

(Actually, honey, there isn't much Tyra wouldn't do for a check)

Of course, Tyra reminded little Miss Big Britches that she's in her hut now and do what the queen says or off with your weave! 

In her mandatory moment of reflection upon oust, Bianca chimed "If I had to do it again, I wouldn't change anything but my shoes" 

Now sashay away. 

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Last Nite's Party: An Evening with Ralph Lauren

(Just the usual Lauren family Christmas card)

Boy am I beat from all the well-moneyed elbow rubbing at last nite's "Evening with Ralph Lauren" hosted by the big O

A small gathering of real close friends benefiting the Ralph Lauren Center for Cancer Care and Prevention and Lincoln Center for Performing Arts, it managed to bring out some real elite beauties. Let's judge they obligatory Ralph Lauren ensembles!

Ralph and Ricky look rich and calm. I guess owning the West Village will do that for a couple. 

Mr Seth Meyers you are the cutest thing ever and that tux is a new but incredibly sexy visual for the collage of you in my head. 

I love you, you crazy B! One of the many reasons is no matter what envelope opening you're attending you always make it seem as the president of the CFDA that it's the only place you'd want to be. You're either 100% invested or the fakest b***h this side of "Bad Girls Club"

Normally Chanel Iman I get a 'happy model' vibe from you, but man did someone lay on the sourpuss big time! I guess if I was stuck in a frock that looks like my sister's go-to 90's wedding guest dress I'd be all pussed up too. 

Former model Hanneli Mustaparta is showing the new blood up big time! And she's got designer of the moment, Prabal Gurung on her arm. Girlfriend knows how to show up to a dinner she's got no intention of eating! 

The beauty of being so rich is that you can dress like Paz de la Huerta and no one calls you out on it. Am I right, Wendi Murdoch? 

It would have been pretty easy to win best dressed at this event since most people wore the same simple long sleeve dresses and fur jackets that litter the Upper East Side on a daily basis, but oh no that's not good enough for Kerry Washington. No, no this b***h had to kill 'em dead! This is like the fashion chic equivalent of Jason Voorhees: no one stands a chance so just get the hell out of the woods! 

Your abundantly apparent disinterest in Ms. Wintour's ramblings only makes my heart beat faster, Mr Seth Meyers. Purr...

Wall Street? Sorry I'm Already Occupied

Afterall, ain't no better way to talk vague politics than over a dark and stormy

Window Dressing on the Side: Rag & Bone

Has Mr Taurus with his soft spot for old dolls with "character" been moonlighting as Rag and Bone's window dresser?

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

This Year's Mac-O'Lantern

It's that time of year again: The annual pumpkin carving and spooky cookie making party at Stately Grand Street Manor

And this year we had a very special guest: Miss Luna from upstairs!

Cutie! We're her favorite place to visit in the whole apartment building. No surprise considering cookie making is a regular activity and it looks like Halloween everyday!

Thanks for the help making the black cat cookies and pulling the "boogers" out of the pumpkin, little lady.

This Ain't No Bert and Ernie

Mr Taurus and I have been banging our heads together all week long trying to generate a brilliant couples costume this year when we should have just picked up New York Magazine

Dressing as Nicki Minaj and Anna Wintour (odd front row pairing at Carolina Herrera's Spring 2012 show) is a stroke of genius! 

What Does the Louis Vuitton Woman Smell Like?


According to Women's Wear Daily, Louis Vuitton is meeting with a third generation scent master (yeah imagine the pressure of that lofty title the next time you groan about your workload) to craft a signature perfume.

But that got me to thinking of duality. Louis Vuitton is one of the many labels over the years that in order to stay relevant has courted a younger market including street artists, rappers and reality tv stars. Will this scent represent the lady who wears dominatrix to the MET Ball or the ubiquitous LV logo over a pair of high top sneakers?

One could also word this as will it be more Marc Jacobs or Phoebe Philo (allegedly) ??

(*Photo from Ebay of vintage Louis Vuitton flask)

Monday, October 24, 2011

Erin O'Connor's Closet from Tales of Endearment

My friend, Natalie Joos, writes a charming fashion and lifestyle blog "Tales of Endearment" which this week featured a peek inside British model, Erin O'Connor's luxe English flat. The choice of inspiring shots was endless and I highly recommend checking this piece out as well as following Endearment.

Friend of It Can't All Be Dior:

Where's the Dead? Where's the WALKING?!

(Waitin' around for something to happen...)

Dear Walking Dead,

In a show about zombie apocalypse, you're running dangerously heavy on narrative. Five minutes of action dropped in is not enough!

(Maybe I'm being greedy to want more zombie ridden, tensions high scenes like this from the season premiere)

Especially after all the episode 2 time lollygagging with the wrap around porch crowd (yeah and that's some screen door stronghold that they're all just a casually sitting around drinking oj and eating Little Debbie zebra cakes)

I guess my advice is this: remember, your audience is compromised of zombie fans. And you're making them hungry.

How Do You Dress for Pumpkin Patchin'?

Well our first lady wears Marc by Marc Jacobs

And looks pretty amaze doing so

But there's more, and dare I say, something political afoot. Recently Mr. G went to a media "Game Changers" party where a certain Kardashian was named the fashion game changer. Holding back my snickers on that last bit, in this era of "Bitch stole my look" and US Weekly, a string of pearls and a pantsuit aren't gonna cut it as first lady attire anymore and Mrs. Obama knows and embraces that fact. She's a fashion game changer. Along with French First Lady, Carla Bruni, Michelle Obama knows that in this Internet age even something as simple as picking the right pumpkin calls for a certain je ne sais quoi

Friday, October 21, 2011

Oh I've Got Plans for You, My Pretty

Rihanna's 90's Redux

Everything about Rihanna's new single "We Found Love" from the Haddaway-esque title to the acid house repetition reminds me of my 90's wasted youth stealing away into warehouses to dance til the wee hours despite homeroom looming just 2 hours after.

Now the video's here and surprise, surprise Miss Fenty has cobbled together a diverse collage of iconic 90's movie imagery:


After a meta-serious voice-over from model Agyness Deyn, a tragic narrative unfolds of two wiry and impossibly beautiful youths flip-flopping between stylistic moping and hoodlum-lite activities like riding around in shopping carts knocking things off the grocery shelves while self-destructing in a sea of bleached hair, shared baths, drug-shot eyes and other mindless mischief that could be easily solved by full time employment.

The funny thing? I like it (Love her look in the car storm off scene! Doin' it!). But then I am firmly on team Rhi-Rhi and my Scottish producer boyfriend Calvin Harris can do no wrong. Purr...

Fashion Algebra: Instant Tower of London Halloween Costume

The world's most pleated and poufy hipped pants by Preen

Plus that hat from Ungaro the other nite and you got you one expensive Halloween costume. I guess you could reuse it for the Renaissance Festival...

(Pleated and puffy black cotton pants, Preen, size 6, $139 New with Tags at Roundabout Soho, 212-966-9166)

MAC Loves Playing Dress Up

Dear Halloween costume planners,

In case you didn't know, MAC makeup lets you pile it on for impact, a trick utilized by pop musicians and conceptual artists alike. Just ask Cindy Sherman (the latter), who is the star of MAC's latest campaign just in time for All Hallows

An ex boyfriend of mine introduced me to Cindy's portraits where she is the sole subject, art director, photographer and makeup and wardrobe stylist taking on various female archetypes in exaggerated expressions and garish guises. You can see why MAC came a'callin' 

And MAC with its history of tongue in cheek ads and embrace of artists just outside the mainstream actually makes sense as a corporate connection. Go ahead cash that check, Cindy!

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Why I LOVE "Ringer"

After one of those rainy days at work where time is ticking by and even the most rudimentary task is torture,  coming home yesterday to a tall frosty episode of "Ringer" on the old DVR is the best revenge

Weeks have passed into this suspenseful series with all its TWISTS (my affectionate nickname for the serpentine plots) and I am hooked. CW is doing little mini-marathons of the first five episodes to catch up mid-season jump ins (Tues October 25th and Monday October 31st. Yes, Halloween, but again a treat to come home to on your TiVo)

In order to sway you, here's my top four reasons the shows more hooky than a Holland, Dozier, Holland track:

1. Sarah Michelle Gellar

Ok this is gonna sound bitchy, but I mean this 100% sincerely: it takes a real actress to open herself up to being the kinda blank canvas that would facilitate stealing your twin sister's identity with none of her loved ones noticing. SMG's that girl and before you think it's early morning claws time, what I mean is SMG is an actress first. Post-Buffy, she's laid low without high-profile gigs she could have done for the money, free of drama and scandal and still beloved with a firmly entrenched audience. She easily slides into this mirror has two faces role and is able to jump between them with grace. Granted it might help that I wasn't a Buffy fan and don't have delusions of slayer projected at Gellar. The biggest irony of all is The CW was probably hoping for the Comic-Con crowd to be instant audience but instead have found a new, mature crowd to please all on the weight of Sarah Michelle's shoulders. Doin' it!

2. The unexpected tangled web of realistic (and completely unrealistic) problems that pop up

Sure this is a soap opera and for most people stealing a presumed dead sibling's identity is not par for the course, but you know what is? Best friends coming to you with they drama, having temptations you need support to overcome, having a past, rebellious teenagers, and secrets. Every time Bridget closes one skeleton carrying closet another little obstacle pops up to challenge her. You're pregnant? Great! Oh wait it might be your sister's mistress who also happens to be her best friend's husband and oh by the way: you're not pregnant cuz you're you and not your sister. Remember? Ooh backed yourself into that one didn't you when you just grabbed her purse and french twist hairstyle for yourself, huh?

(Damn, can't a girl just go get her hair did?!)

3. The fashion

Pretty faggy to point this out, but this is also a post about a CW soap opera. On a fashion blog. Go with me. Bridget might be taking on Siobhan's Park Avenue wardrobe

but that B packed all the good ish off to Paris, darlin'

Tres bien-er! 

4. The Hunks

A golden rule of soaps: remember your audience. So we gals and gays get sexy object of Siobhan's affair-ction Henry

Strapping, sly and a fan of the Natural History Museum?


And then there's the vaguely pedo teacher Mr. Carpenter at Juliet's new public school

Nerd cute alert! 

Still not convinced? Well fine, be a dum-dum. Just don't be one of those dum-dums making Zooey Deschanel the new Charlie Sheen!

About Me

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I'm a fashion writer who writes for Bluefly, EDGE Media, VIRAL Fashion, etc. I use "It Can't All Be Dior" as a safe release for my love of coats, cats and cake. Phew!