Madonna at the Met Ball 2013

Madonna may be a lot of things, but she's never been one to miss an opportunity. The Met Ball's theme this year is Punk and Chaos and having come up in the New York post-punk dance and art scene, Madonna has a special proto-version of punk and how it affected the NYC scene

Mostly, though, this b*tch knows how to shut it down 

She is workin' that custom Givenchy (although the color choice of her Casadei shoes, hot pink, as punk is a little too Hot Topic in my opinion) 

And extra props for the padlock necklace with the very special duplicitous "M" in the signature Met font 

Sneaky sneak! 

GILTy Purchase: Anarchy in the Flash Sales!

GILT suggests offsetting this Leslie Danzis faux leather cuff with a simple cotton sundress or crisp tee.

I dunno about the sundress, but for the tee might I suggest one straight from the 

Hot Topic 

With perhaps the Sex Pistols or Misfits on it? 

(Also available in black. Of course.)

(Leslie Danzis Resin Druzy and Faux Leather Cuff, $39 at WWW.Gilt.com)

Fashion Trend Death Knell: Leave these Flat Platforms in the 90's Please!

(They're coming to get you, Barbara...)

If we're to believe the Spring 2011 runways, women want to look like flatfooted visions of non-sex in these hideous cement shoes. 

Again. 

Weren't these bad enough the first go 'round in the 90's? 

They didn't Spice Up my Life then and their flavor makes me extra queasy now. Ladies, do me and your Facebook photo album a favor and avoid this trend like the Hot Topic plague it is! 

(Run like Hell from Chanel)

(Disregard Marc)

(Parade away from Prada)

Please, please, please be careful. A coronation of ugly Frankenstein shoe editorials and ads is coming our way! But we must fight back against the days of vinyl pants, ska influences and monster shoes. I got my pitchfork, grab your torch!